Oh new apartment, how do we love thee? Let us count the ways.
We love thee for thy dishwasher and weird yet handy trash compactor.
Our souls rejoice in thy excessive amount of storage space,
ridiculous number of closets, and spacious rooms.
We love thee freely because utilities seem free because
they are at a blessed fixed rate
We love thee purely, for thy extra bedroom, washer/dryer, new carpet, and
friendly neighbors that have a little boy that shouts at construction workers.
But, oh dear apartment, claimer of non-smoking standards,
must you freaking REEK of cigarette smoke so much that we sit
in church on Sunday (feeling pious) and realize
both our shirts smell like we're recovering chain smokers?
Our love was close to perfection, apartment, so so close...
...oh, and if you could work on the spider thing too that would be great. Thanks.